This women's day, I simply could not stop myself from writing a
post. No, this is not about women's rights, this is not about empowerment and
this is not about sexual harassment, female infanticide, dowry and other social
evils..
This post is against ridiculous ways of celebrating International
Women's Day. This post is against all those who think women need special job
offers, special rights or empowerment (I swear this word reminds me of Rahul
Gandhi more than anything or anyone else). What girls and women really need is
liberty and empathy and what we are giving them is the exact opposite.
An Appeal to all Companies
When I had my first interview, guys around me said, "Getting
core mechanical jobs is so easy for girls, all auto sector companies
"prefer" girls in order to improve the sex ratio". When I had my
second job interview, which was for a PSU, guys around me said, "Getting
into a PSU is a cakewalk for girls. They would take them in any case, it is a
government organization, they have to increase the number of women employees.”
Do you think I blame guys for such an attitude? I am not sure if I
should blame them, but I do blame all those companies that are coming up with a
"Special" Recruitment Drive for Women.
For God's sake, stop! Please stop these recruitment drives in the
name of HR initiatives and CSR. Jobs for women blessed with affluent and well educated parents do not fall under Corporate Social Responsibility and it does not
bridge the so-called gap in any manner.
Women are equally intelligent, deserving and competitive. A
special recruitment drive for them is a reservation in a way and reservations
of any sort have nothing to do with liberty. What you are doing is not
empowering women, it is simply advocating and exemplifying what young guys feel
about recruitment in Indian companies.
If you really want to do something for women and their liberty,
invest in educating young girls.
If you really want to do something, tell workers from shop floors, Chai walas and sweepers in their company that their wives deserve to be respected, teach them not to get drunk
and beat their wives, teach them that domestic violence is a criminal offence.
An Appeal to all Parents
You love your daughters and you want them to grow up as educated,
independent women. The word independence does not mean being financially
independent only. It is about aspirations, thoughts and desires.
Stop preparing her to get married, stop preparing her to be
perfect. She is a human being and would always remain imperfect. Stop telling her
things that you never mention to your sons. Why is it OK for her brother to
abuse while she can’t? Why is it OK for her male cousins to get drunk at a
family function while she can’t? Why is it OK for guys of her age to watch
porn, while she can't even think of doing that?
Why do you expect your daughters to be sophisticated, pretty, naive,
innocent and teetotalers? Why does society have different rules for girls and
guys? For every MMS scandal, for every rape case, for every case of pre-marital
sex and teenage pregnancy, why do we say, “He was a guy, it is OK for a guy to
do so, after all, men will be men, but she was a girl, she should have been
careful. Why didn’t her parents teach her anything?”
I find this absolutely ridiculous. Why is it “normal” for a man to
have sex or have the desire to have sex while it is “immoral” and “a sin” for
girls?
Please do not let your ethics and moral values be gender based. The
definition of right and wrong, moral and immoral must be the same for both
girls and boys. That’s it.
An Appeal to the great Indian Education System
They say that Indian schools must introduce sex education for
teenagers. Yeah, right, we live in a society where one can openly talk of
Cancer and not of AIDS and we talk of sex education!
Teenagers do not need a biology class that includes facts about
our hormones and reproductive system. What boys actually need is an open session
to teach them that there is more to a woman than her boobs and legs, to counsel
them about relationships, to guide them so that they grow up to be responsible men
who respect women, who treat them as equals, who have the ability to empathize
with them.
A message to all women
You do not need a day to remind you that you are
special. Love yourself. Respect yourself. Respect your goals and ambitions,
value your independence. You were not born to make sacrifices, you were not
born to follow what society says, you were born to live your life on your own
terms! Cheers!!
Sonia
