4 Reasons Why You Shouldn't Miss Dum Laga Ke Haisha!

After watching a frustratingly slow and torturous movie like Roy, I had almost lost hopes of finding a story in a Bollywood movie..

And being away from my blogs for almost one year, I had been thinking that I've become too lazy to write something..

And then I watched a movie that made me smile genuinely..I mean, I felt like writing about it from the bottom of my heart..Before I start writing about it, let me tell you, this is more than just a movie review..

1. Beauty is Simplicity

90s' plot, cassettes, Kumar Sanu's voice, land line phones and missed calls..what else could you ask for nostalgia? This movie is all about small, sweet and simple things that would make you smile..It covers the minutest details of the characters, their lifestyles, their circumstances, their mindsets..

You do not always need a hot couple or a perfect cinematography for a romantic flick. The song "Ye moh moh ke dhaage" is simply bound to make you fall in love with the movie..

2. Bhumi Pednekar as Sandhya

You may call her fat, or you may say that she played the role of a fatso..but she was a real beauty..Sandhya was perfectly confident..And as I say, beauty is confidence, confidence is beauty..She loved herself and knew that she deserved to be loved..She was from a conservative family, but she did not succumb to the family pressure of being a part of a love-less, lifeless marriage..She valued her dreams, her aspirations, her dignity..

Hats off to Bhumi for being Sandhya, for performing with an effortless ease..

3. Marriage is not an event, it is a Journey..

Talk to a random girl in India who is about to get married..She'll talk about a Lehenga that costs more than 50k, jewels, accessories and make-up..I find it totally ridiculous when people tell me that I should marry before I turn 25, varna face ka glow chala jayega, dulhan wali baat nahi rahegi..

Talk to a random parent in India who is looking for an ideal bride or a groom.. They'll talk about a decent job, decent looks, decent family background..and yes, cliched though it may sound.."Jodi achchhi lagni chahiye"

Really??? So you think marriage is all about a perfectly beautiful bride, a grand event, ceremonies and two individuals who look good together? Why is it so important for a bride to look young or pretty or slim? Moreover, what would go wrong if jodi achcchi na lage? Are you buying a product with specific dimensions, features and configurations? No. 

Having said that, the movie talks about romance which is not only unconventional for Bollywood, but also unconventional for people like me and you, and that's the best part..

4. Accepting Imperfections

A not-so-good-looking girl with a not-so-educated, good-for-nothing-types guy..
But the movie doesn't preach about compromising, compromise for family or for marriage..

The story talks of giving time, forgiving for mistakes and accepting whatever seemed to be imperfect in the beginning.. As I always say, the first postulate of love is acceptance..If you aren't able to accept someone for who he is, you aren't in love, you have never been in love with the person..

For when you are in love, you accept all imperfections happily..Togetherness gives you immense support..

Overall, Dum Laga Ke Haisha is a cute movie that makes you feel good and makes you smile..

Rating : ***1/2

P.S. 

1. Ayushmaan Khurrana looks cute as Lappu ! :-D

2.Writing a blog after a long long break of 360 days feels awesome !

3. Planning to write more movie reviews.. 

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Marriage MATERIAL or a LIVEly Daughter??

Ever since I have started working in a government organization, people around me keep saying, "your prospects of getting married to a nice guy are brighter and better now " I always feel like laughing at this illogical statement and I fail to understand why a job or its type is linked to marriage in India, more importantly, why is every fucking thing treated as an eligibility criteria for being an ideal marriage material for Indian girls? Right from her looks to her education, right from her health to her job, everything perhaps has one primary objective- to make her eligible for getting married, to make her perfect in every sense, not with an intention to teach her how to be a good citizen/woman/daughter/wife/mother, but with a fear in their minds, a fear that one day she has to get married and her future in laws expect her to be perfect!!
Confused?? Read the following points one by one, please note that every word is TRUE and REAL

• She is a school kid, like all kids of her age ,she loves playing and watching TV much more than cooking and other household chores, but her mother always tells her that if she does not learn how to cook ,she will be in deep trouble after she gets married, in fact ,this would act as a hindrance in their path to find a suitable match for her.. Why do we have to teach our kids in such a fashion that inculcates fear in them, that makes them feel scared of marriage and in laws at the age when they don't even know what marriage is? Why can't we simply tell them that they ought to learn things for their own good ?
• She is a bright student. She has always been a hard working and sincere girl. However, one fine day, when she could not score well in an exam, her mother warned her about competition for jobs , telling her that everyone 'asks' and 'demands' for working women these days..People say that nowadays parents consider education of their daughters as important as education for their sons, the exact reason lies in the previous statement! Can't she have her own ambitions? Shouldn't we ask her to work hard and be independent? Perhaps her own ambitions don't exist for all those people who think she should work only to meet the 'demands' of people looking for a working wife for their sons!
• She was a lively,bubbly college kid, she never cared about what others thought of her, her friends used to call her 'fatty' for she was slightly overweight, it never affected her much! One fine day , her mother told her, " Nobody would marry you if you continue to gain weight like this" and that was the first time when she was affected by a comment! Why can't we ask our daughters to take care of their own health and fitness in the first place? Isn't her well being important otherwise? Why is her being perfectly eligible for marriage more important than her being perfectly fit and fine? Aren't we responsible for making them feel confident ?
• She was a talented, creative fashion designer working for a boutique ,she wanted to have her own startup, but her family insisted that she should think of getting married now for she was 25 already! Why is society's pressure valued more than a girl's dreams and plans? Doesn't she have a right to be ambitious? Who makes these ridiculous rules? 

A mother can never even think of doing something that makes her daughter sad, yet,without realizing the emotional and psychological impact of all these things on her daughter, she continues to do so..why? The answer is simple. Indian parents are the victims of Indian society, they can't stand their daughters being not suitable in the eyes of the society! Sadly, even TV serials and movies promote the same culture, the same ideologies that preach that a girl's life is all about one major life event- marriage and her parents ought to prepare her for that right from the day she is born.

Marriage, undoubtedly , is like the biggest turning point in a person's life! But why do we expect a person to be perfect when we think of getting married? I find it incomprehensibly difficult to believe that people totally forget things like compatibility and mutual understanding! The irony is that they fail to realize that they are looking for a daughter-in-law, who is a human being, with her own flaws, her own qualities, her own beliefs, they are not going to buy a product with desirable configurations and specifications!

The message is simple and is dedicated to all Indian parents with an intention to make them understand something very important. She has her own life, her own identity! She doesn't deserve to be treated like a commodity in a market of cut throat competition! She deserves to be respected!
Love her, care for her , make her feel confident , make her feel beautiful, ask her to respect herself, teach her to love herself the way she is! Ask her to explore the whole world, teach her to be bold, be optimistic! Let her be free, let her discover herself, let her dream, let her aspire, let her strive for success, let her smile, let her be !

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THE BIG FAT INDIAN WEDDING

The saga of Arranged Marriages in India...

When you are in your early twenties,when you have a job that pays well, when you are said to be a sweet and innocent girl, when you have a decent family background, when you're neither skinny nor fat, you are bound to be surrounded by "Aunties", day dreaming about their son's wedding and thinking whether or not you would be an ideal daughter-in-law five years down the line..

And the reason why I'm writing this blog is simply the fact that I find it hard to believe that most of the middle aged men and women in India feel that the above mentioned reasons are enough for a girl to be a perfect match for their son, goes without saying that she should belong to the same community as well..

Well, 90% marriages in India might be arranged, and of course, they are said to be successful (only because they do not result in divorces), so even if people live their entire life compromising their happiness for they are 'supposed to' live together..they are labelled as happy couples with a happy married life..

And here goes a list of what arranged marriages are all about, please notice the word NOT in each point..

• The day a girl child is born in India, her parents start making plans about the way they'll manage the expenses to make her wedding a grand affair..They say,you get married only once in life, and you ought to make it a memorable day..Well, if a billionaire spends 1 crore for a wedding, its justified,but if a simple middle class man is spending 25 lakhs for a wedding, he is actually giving away whatever he had earned in his life.. Most of the readers might disagree, but endless rituals and extravagant expenditures can NOT contribute towards a happy married life.. It is only because of the kind of society we live in, it has, unnecessarily, become a necessity..
• Marriage is NOT a money game.. Everyone knows that any relationship based on greed and luxuries can never last long, even then, arranged marriages in India are all about the guy's salary package, the girl's salary package, the family business, the family status and so on.. I do not realize the reason why girls wish to marry a guy just because he's earning loads and loads of money.. Money can get you anything, but it can't buy happiness, and never buy the compatibility and mutual understanding that matters the most..
• Relatives, society, religions and communities do NOT have any right to control your life and pressurize you for anything at all, leave alone something as crucial as your own marriage.. Once again, the society and its people have a great influence, and unfortunately, its almost unavoidable in India..
• People somehow forget that their kids' marriage is NOT only about fulfilling their responsibility, but the most important decision in their kids' lives...They ought to give them as much time as they want, rather than being in a hurry to get rid of their own responsibility, rather than being pressurized by the society..
• Match making centers, matrimonial sites and astrologers and relatives can NOT really predict whether two individuals will be happy spending their life together or not!

Part- II

And, finally, the saga of the Great Indian Wedding comes to an end..
I, therefore, begin with the purpose of writing this blog.. It may sound weird, but I am really not promoting love marriages, for somehow, I feel people have forgotten the meaning of love..for marriage is about compatibility, love, mutual understanding, acceptance, togetherness, friendship and much more ! I simply wish to write about the importance of things that matter much more than the criteria by match making centers and middle aged Indian people..

Well, every individual has some elements of madness, some elements of weirdness, and he/she is actually incomplete without the same..We all have some beliefs, some principles, certain ideologies that we wish to live with.. And, therefore, if you have to spend your entire life with someone, you would at least want the person to know and understand what makes you who you are!

It is not necessary that two individuals should have the same likes and dislikes, same ideologies, to get along well.. The only thing that matters is the fact that one should 'accept' you the way you are and respect you, love you for the same!

Friendship and love are not about merely sharing your likes and interests, experiences and phases of your life.. Sometimes, its about sharing a part of yourself.. When two individuals have a perfect mutual understanding, they are always there for each other, no matter what.. No misunderstandings, no sad phases can affect the fact that they can't let each other go !! And perhaps, this is what you require to be happy together, everything else is secondary..
Moreover, nobody is perfect.. You cannot expect a huge list of amazing qualities to be there in any person at all..A perfect relationship is all about whether or not you are perfect for each other..

All you need is a companion, a person who cares for you truly, who understands you perfectly, who cannot see you being sad and puts in efforts for your happiness,who knows all your flaws yet sees a flawless person in you and above all, someone who has complete faith in you..

Well, when you are tired of your job and you come back home, when you are sick and frustrated of things going around you, you need someone to give you a hug, to cheer you up, to be with you and support you when you are at your weakest..
Everyone deserves a person "meant for him"... and hence, only two factors should control the same, what destiny offers to you and what you wish to choose !

At the end, all I wanna say is, "love cannot be arranged"

Cheers !!

P.S.
All kinda comments are welcome, feel free to say anything at all.. but its a humble request from my side, please do read it with an open mind and think before forming an opinion !

Next blog soon !
Sonia

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